The Toltec Agreements
PERSONAL GROWTH
If you've been interested in personal development and/or spirituality for a while, it's very likely that you've already heard of the Toltec agreements.
Personally, I discovered them several years ago while washing, as my grandmother had them displayed in her bathroom. Her idea of leaving them there to soak in worked well, since I knew them by heart and would occasionally think about them, even when I didn't have the intention of reading the book at the time.
I don't really like (or rather, not at all) being told what to do — especially not if it's coming from a cis man. That's actually why I wasn't very interested in personal development back then; I preferred to go my own way and learn from my experiences and encounters around the world.
Well, I've grown, evolved, and above all, I've understood that my freedom belongs to me and that no one can take it away; reading such a book would simply be an opportunity to learn new things, assimilate the information that interested me, and leave the rest behind.
So, (years later) I decided to take a look at the work of Miguel Ruiz and his son by devouring The Four Agreements and The Fifth Agreement in three days. Then I digested all of that for a few more years and, finally, I decided to address the topic here.
As I said on Instagram, rather than taking these agreements as rules or resolutions (which would give them a compulsory connotation, like an imposition, which in my case as someone obsessed with freedom would be a total deal breaker), I invite you to see them as tools of evolution, railings that you can choose to lean on during your personal journey towards happiness.
Let's take them one by one.
❂ Be impeccable with your word
We're starting strong, probably with the most problematic agreement for the majority of us. I know what I'm talking about, I'm an Aries, so fiery and assertive, and I sometimes struggle to meditate on my words before speaking them.
The thing is, words have weight, history, and their own energy print. All of this is closely related to the fifth chakra, the throat chakra (I mention it in the training and the E-Book explaining how to align your chakras), which can be difficult to keep balanced. It's indeed the chakra of expressing our truth, and taboos and other limitations are common in our current society.
Maintaining impeccable speech means choosing words with precision and kindness, communicating only what we consider true, useful, and for the well-being of all involved. It also implies controlling your tone and intention. I know, a lot to think about before doing something as natural as speaking.
The idea here isn't to inhibit or censor ourselves, but to understand that each word, whether spoken, signed, or written, carries with it an energy that will affect both the listener and ourselves.
Moreover, what we choose to share is an extension of our personality, of our identity; paying more attention to it and being precise is choosing concretely who we want to be and what we want to offer to the world around us.
❂ Don't take anything personally
Ah! Another easy task, right? After all, everything we know comes from our personal learnings and experiences. And any new matter will also be processed by the brain based on the data it has been provided with previously. So, it's perfectly natural to compare and interpret events and situations based on our own experience, through the prism of our own reality.
However, if this is true for you, it's equally true for absolutely everyone else. Each person lives their own reality and faces life based on their past learnings, but also based on their psycho-emotional and energy state at the moment.
The key to being able to detach from the acts and opinions of others is to focus on your own development, to work on your alignment and balance. A person who takes the time to regularly assess their overall well-being and to maintain a life in harmony with the calls of their soul and the messages of their heart will have greater ease in discerning, maintaining calm, and showing compassion towards the words and actions of others. What we say or do is the result of what we experience and feel. Integrating this truth can allow you to be more patient and detached while facing behaviours that could be hurtful but are simply the result of angst that does not belong to you.
❂ Don't make assumptions
I'll always be first in encouraging anyone to use their imagination and creativity, but it's always useful to choose the context. Making up stories about the unknown, what we don't control, simply involves wasting time and overheating the mind. I speak from experience, it took me a while to integrate this agreement. It can be difficult to let go, to accept that we can't control everything, and to simply focus on the here and now. But when we do, it's liberating!
In kindergarten and early primary school, we get children used to the idea that the world continues to be active outside of the space where they are, regardless of their presence and will. The same goes for adults, we must understand and accept that others act freely in our absence and that trying to predict their actions leads nowhere.
It can never be repeated enough: the past no longer exists and the future does not yet exist. The only time that matters is the present. It is only by integrating this truth that we can truly embody with full awareness and appreciate the softness of the moment.
❂ Always do your best
While the first three agreements are about our positioning and the management of our mind, this one is more about our actions.
In our competitive and elitist society, we might interpret this saying as an encouragement to be the best at everything. But it's not about competition or overwork. Doing your best simply means consciously choosing the actions you perform, and leaving aside the ones you prefer not to do.
Instead of always doing more but neglecting some tasks because you're not motivated, or because you act out of obligation, the fourth agreement encourages you to identify what you want, what suits you, and to dedicate yourself fully to it.
Yes, we live in society and there are obligations blah blah blah we're not in Wonderland and all that... But, first of all, you can decide to what extent you want to tolerate obligations and what's in it for you, or you can simply tell those that are already obsolete to get lost.
Also, nothing needs to be entirely radical, you are always free to make compromises and only get rid of what seems reasonable to you.
The important point here is to give more time, space, and total dedication to what makes you feel good, to what is worthwhile for you.
Because when you mobilise the body, the heart, and the mind in the service of the same task, you can reach your full potential, align with the frequency of life, and miracles will happen.
Moreover, it is always much more satisfying to do things well than to do them halfway and produce a mediocre result. This reflects a much better image of who you are, it's better for your self-esteem, and it manifests an energy of quality. And positive energy attracts positive energy, quality attracts quality; it's the law of attraction, you know the drill. You get what you give. If you vibrate with satisfaction, you will attract abundance. So, always do your best, and the Universe will boomerang the best to you. It's as simple as that.
❂ The fifth agreement
Personally, I summarise it as "Doubt everything."
My reality is different from yours and from anyone else's. As I mentioned earlier, any new information that comes to us is processed through the filter of our past experiences and learning, but also through the limiting beliefs accumulated over time. And we all have limiting beliefs; some are more or less universal, others are specific to each person's experience.
The fifth agreement goes much deeper than the previous ones, as it reminds us that we are constantly in search of truth and freedom, but that there is no absolute truth, nor a place where the limits of the mind do not impose themselves on us.
This may sound a bit worrying as information to assimilate: nothing is true, doubt everything, even your thoughts. There's a very Matrix-Apocalypse ring to it.
But understanding it is actually a gift and allows us to take a step back, gain perspective, and show compassion towards others. It teaches us that everything is subjective, that each being lives a different reality, and that it would be unfair to blame others for not perceiving the world exactly the way we do. It's an invitation to put yourself in other people's shoes to enrich your points of view, but also to simply let go and allow yourself to be.
Because that's the key, the one that always seems to come back: to simply be. Embody your own truth by showing spontaneity and authenticity. Find the balance that suits you and fills you with joy. Because the only thing you can really trust, what will always guide you towards what is best for you, your compass, is the joy that brightens your heart.
But you know, after all, I'm just interpreting these writings through the prism of my learnings... If you want to go further, I invite you to judge for yourself by reading the books!
Whatever you decide, these five principles are filled with wisdom and are, in my opinion, excellent foundations for building a brilliant evolution. I hope you share this opinion and that the Toltec agreements will nourish your process of personal development the way it did with mine.
❂ Thank you for reading me ❂
